The Texas Highway Death Race & The Tragic iPad Mini Incident

Jack Had Rose. My iPad Had a $9 Case. None Survived.

Jack Had Rose. My iPad Had a $9 Case. None Survived.

The Texas Highway Death Race

So, this morning, I had the absolute pleasure of driving down Central Expressway 75 South—which, if you’ve never had the privilege, is basically a real-life Mad Max sequel, but with more trucks, minivans, fewer rules, and a whole lot of student drivers. Every car was going at least 80 mph, some even past 100 mph. I am sure.

I wanted to slow down. I really did. But have you ever noticed how cars in Texas drive in these tight little herds, like they’re migrating across the plains? And the moment you try to break free, someone behind you is already inches away from your bumper like, "You either keep up, or you die, buddy."

So, I do what any rational human would do—I get away from the pack. If things get too sketchy, I’ll even take an exit, breathe for a second, and then rejoin the chaos at the next ramp like, "Su…